Before criticizing a man, walk a mile in his shoes

“In my shoes, just to see
What it’s like, to be me
I’ll be you, let’s trade shoes
Just to see what it’d be like to
Feel your pain, you feel mine
Go inside each other’s minds
Just to see what we find
Look at things through each other’s eyes”

These are the lyrics of the song “Beautiful” sung by famous Rap singer Eminem. Dropping out from school in 9th standard after failing three times, his passion for rap only grew more, which he developed at age 4. His wife left him while he was still struggling in the industry. After being rejected by the fellow rap singers in his early career due to his “Race” and after being called stupid, the emotions which he felt were later seen in his songs which made him king of Rap. What he wanted to say through these lyrics is,” If you want to criticize me or judge me, live my life for a day.  You’ll know what I’m made of.”

What makes a man? We have seen people who are successful in life, and we also know some who have failed. We adore the people who are successful only if we like them, but tend to criticize the one which we don’t like and link them with having sheer luck. Same is in the case of failure. But what we tend to ignore are the circumstances, through which they have to go whether they taste success or not.

Sahir just gave his matriculation examination. He didn’t study seriously for the whole year but during the last three months, he gave his everything for the examination. His exams went well. Before the result, his neighbors mocked him and asked him to join some private tuition just in case he failed. Result came out. He was one of the 100 students in the topper’s list of the state board. Now the neighbors said that he have cheated in the examination. See? You can’t keep everyone happy. He was criticized before the result and even after the result, rather than getting appreciation. What they didn’t see was his dedicated hard-work.

But why is that people criticize others even without knowing through what they have been?

Sana is a young girl. She lost her sister. During here college days, she became friend with a fellow student and made her “God sister”. She shared everything with her. Later on she found that her “God-sister” was making fun of her behind her back for being “emotional”. Did she deserve that? No. Nobody knew what she lost when she was a young kid.

Life is like finger-print. It’s different for everyone. For some people it’s about making to the top, for some it’s all about surviving the day. We cheered every time Sachin Tendulkar scored a run, but criticized him whenever he got out early in any big match, failing to realize the pressure which he was in before facing the ball and at the same time, carrying the expectations of millions of fans on his shoulders.

At the same time somewhere else, there is a person who is not so famous as Sachin. That person just wants to earn some money, so that he can feed his family. He works in some small shop. His relatives call him worthless. They don’t know that he left his government job the first week, after being harshly treated there just because he is from backward class.

Judging and criticizing every time, without even knowing the other’s condition seems strident. But it is not always that callous if taken in a positive way.

India, recently at COP 21 in Paris, provided her framework to reduce emission intensity by 33 to 35 per cent by 2030 compared to 2005 levels and aimed for 175 GW of solar, wind energy by 2022. Developed countries called it over-ambitious goal. They didn’t realize India’s concern for energy security and environment at the same time. But even after these harsh comments, India is successfully working through “International Solar Alliance” to make its aim a reality and to establish it as a leader in clean energy.

Even if this criticizing helps or not, but from where does it come from? This is due to lack of tenderness and compassion, which as a society we tend to ignore or forget when we find ourselves or others in a condition, where we have not been or will never be. Seeing it the other way, if we already have suffered the situation through which other is going, we’ll never criticize him because we’ll know his case.

We can never live the life of others. Neither we have the right to destroy it. Appreciating someone and giving a hand without even knowing what he’s going through, is a sense of “empathy” which can only be developed. Empathy is understanding the feelings of others without going through it in real life. But as simple as “empathy” sounds, it is as hard to attain. Being constantly honest and truthful to yourself and others, and at the same time, striving for the best brings out a feeling of benevolence, which slowly but steadily leads to empathy.

I don’t know how it’s like to be a fully compassionate person. We all are struggling to be that. Empathy is hard- earned. We hurt others knowingly and unknowingly. But we should not forget that,” If we all put our imperfections, vulnerabilities and problems in a well, we’ll love to pick out our own after viewing the glitches of others.”

PS: Hey you friends! 1st time written without any help! Please be “critical” and “harsh” and show no “empathy” 😀 😀 😀 🙂

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24 thoughts on “Before criticizing a man, walk a mile in his shoes

  1. Assalam Walekkum Bhaijaan wo b chashme wale !!
    pichli bar Mahir is bar Sahir agali bar kahin Tahir ko b ghusad dena:D
    under ka aaj aapka eminem nikal hi aaya>>>>pr sahi entry mari>>pta ni aise examr ko gane wane pasand ate h ki ni>> pr mere hisab se to cooooooooool tha wo:)
    philo plus gs ka gyaan >>>kmaaaaaal
    not so famous as sachin wala example>> tikh tikh sa laga:)
    qustn k sath sath as answer explain karna>>>ultim tha:)
    each n every para well connected bt at the end con waise to acha h pr umeed thi ki kuch wow! k sath end hoga>>yeh 2nd tym apka con tikh tikh laga (usme likhi baat to cool h pr thoda or chihiye tha)>>bhavna smajh gy honge:)
    aap bikul ready eassy k paper k liye >>jao upsc ko bolo mera paper nikal do main toh abhi dena:):)
    khooooob bhalo…………keeep writing:):)
    thankswaaaa:)
    boundry yohooo!

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Valekuumsalam s@@#$%&c 🙂
    Ye sahir mahir wali sari stories Tahir ki hi hoti h, bus naam change hote 😀
    Conclusion problem ye hai ki mummi was calling for dinner, so jaldi post kar dia! Next time Harkuch wala conclusion dunga! Me b match hi dekh Ra hu 😉
    Hahahahahahah you’re so funny! Abhi mains de du 😂😂😂
    Thanks for the review! Will improve ! And tu sach me dude h bache! 5 min k bolne k andar hi review! Really appreciate it! Thanks dear friend 🙂

    Like

  3. maine 5 min main to bilkul ni diya……………gannit bahut kamjor h…….apna op change kr lo abi b tym h:P…….apni mail ka tym or mere rply ka tym milana zara kya wo 5 min h?>>>>>>>>>>> ooooooooh Tahir hillllllll gya:D
    sachi ghatnao pe adharit eassy>>>>>>hmmmmmmmmmmm:)

    Like

  4. Hi Tahir, my views-
    1. Intro- not sure about this. Examiner ko nahi accha lagta hua Eminem, maan lo 😛
    Personally, I found it good. But lets wait for others to review as well.
    2. Examples were pretty apt.
    3. India CoP21 example- uska relevance thoda clear nahi hua
    4. Critical part missing tha. Batman included the same.
    5. Conclusion this time- (y)
    Kuch analysis part me repetition si lagi. Baki, if we consider the fact that u wrote without taking any help- in that case it was good.
    Keep writing. Aaj to maine likha nahi. Match dekho aaram se tum 😛
    All the best 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Yayyyy!! jeet gaye ^_^
      Thanks Ishaaaaaa for the detailed review!
      haan, bus lyrics copied the! but yaad hai mjhe, roz hi sunta hu 😀
      i too do not know about intro part, just wrote it 🙂
      haan thoda chota likha hai aaj yaar!!
      haan baki improvement ka scope is always there, to be true!
      Thanks! Tu jab next time likhegi, to phle tera review! pinky promise 🙂 😀

      Liked by 1 person

  5. Nice article Sahir :p
    I think I know Sana too 😳
    Start- Mai to rap kar rahi thi :p and I know how much you love Eminem and he has inspired you a lot anddd this time I didn’t find any flaw in conclusion.
    PS now you can reply me on WhatsApp dater 😂

    Liked by 1 person

  6. Very good Brother (Y)
    bahot acha likha hai… interesting and mazzedaar 😛 eminem _/\_
    thoda dimensions add kar sakte ho..like critical part… examples were good..
    mera essay padh k dekho..kuch alag kia hai iss baar…
    last ball (means last line) pe SIX maara hai is baar/.. very good 😀
    keep writing !!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Hahahah!! Thanks siso! 😀 _/\_
      hmm..will keep my eagle eyes on all dimensions next time!!
      Ahem Ahem!! Tu kuch miss kar rhi h i guess! :/
      haan, bus aa rha tera review karne! 🙂
      Thank u sooooo mcuh dear bud!

      Liked by 1 person

  7. Hello Bhaiya Ji, my views:
    1)Write the lyrics directly and explain its essence. No one wants to know who is Eminem
    2)Language is very smooth, easy to connect with your ideas
    3)You can avoid technical data, no need to explain so much
    4)Second last para: “giving a hand without even knowing”, I guess the first step towards empathy is ‘knowing’
    5)Why, who of criticism explained, can talk about constructive criticism and the fact that just knowing the circumstances doesn’t become an excuse for the immoral acts
    Overall, good. Loved the language really. Try to write without internet, brings originality. Keep it up 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  8. Hey Tahir,
    You are such a fabulous writer………… introduction bhaut achcha likha hai.. ekdam damdaar
    Flow aur connectivity dona bhaut achchi thi lekin ye COP 21 vala kuch fit nahi hua…
    I was really absorbed reading your content but you may write even better if this is your first essay without anyone’s help then really hats off to you.. 🙂
    Keep writing ….. ham sabka naam raushan karenge… Tahir ji.. 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Hey Jaya 😀
      first of all, aisa kuch nhi!! aapne just ye sab bolke mjhpr next time k lie ek “pressure” la dia hai 🙂
      and haan, i too felt ki connect nhi hua ye example but mjhe international agenda wala koi point mila hi nhi compare kare ko us time par likhte hue!
      Thanks a lot 🙂
      and hum sab karenge ek saath! We shall overcome! 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

  9. Hii tahir quereshi… 😛
    I was feeling very low today… After reading your essay… I realise that it’s our life and no one know our circumstances… And now review :
    1) connection me abhi bhi thodi problem hai
    2)Eminem vala example… Mst 🙂 but Eminem ke sath shayd examiner apne emotions Na connect kr paye.. 😉 I mean Bht logon ne Bht struggle ke bad Kuch paya hai like Mandela, Abraham Lincoln etc etc… I think vo bhi add ho skte the… Sahir ke Na padhne ka reason ni btaya tune :-P… Sana vala example was good.. Solar power Kuch samajh ni Aaya… Examples ke bad Ekdum se end ho gya… Usme improvement… Second time without help likha hai… So Uske hisab se mst hai.. 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Hahahha!! Thanks agar essay padh k acha laga teko!
      haan good idea! Abe Lincoln ka example b de skta, but fir wo intro me “lyrics” wala part nhi de pata 😀
      yo! ye international agenda jamma nhi!! dekhta hu next time kuch explicit type 😛
      Thanks vaise review k lie! 🙂

      Like

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