Before criticizing a man, walk a mile in his shoes

“In my shoes, just to see
What it’s like, to be me
I’ll be you, let’s trade shoes
Just to see what it’d be like to
Feel your pain, you feel mine
Go inside each other’s minds
Just to see what we find
Look at things through each other’s eyes”

These are the lyrics of the song “Beautiful” sung by famous Rap singer Eminem. Dropping out from school in 9^th standard after failing three times, his passion for rap only grew more, which he developed at age 4. His wife left him while he was still struggling in the industry. After being rejected by the fellow rap singers in his early career due to his “Race” and after being called stupid, the emotions which he felt were later seen in his songs which made him king of Rap. What he wanted to say through these lyrics is,” If you want to criticize me or judge me, live my life for a day.  You’ll know what I’m made of.”

What makes a man? We have seen people who are successful in life, and we also know some who have failed. We adore the people who are successful only if we like them, but tend to criticize the one which we don’t like and link them with having sheer luck. Same is in the case of failure. But what we tend to ignore are the circumstances, through which they have to go whether they taste success or not.

Sahir just gave his matriculation examination. He didn’t study seriously for the whole year but during the last three months, he gave his everything for the examination. His exams went well. Before the result, his neighbors mocked him and asked him to join some private tuition just in case he failed. Result came out. He was one of the 100 students in the topper’s list of the state board. Now the neighbors said that he have cheated in the examination. See? You can’t keep everyone happy. He was criticized before the result and even after the result, rather than getting appreciation. What they didn’t see was his dedicated hard-work.

But why is that people criticize others even without knowing through what they have been?

Sana is a young girl. She lost her sister. During here college days, she became friend with a fellow student and made her “God sister”. She shared everything with her. Later on she found that her “God-sister” was making fun of her behind her back for being “emotional”. Did she deserve that? No. Nobody knew what she lost when she was a young kid.

Life is like finger-print. It’s different for everyone. For some people it’s about making to the top, for some it’s all about surviving the day. We cheered every time Sachin Tendulkar scored a run, but criticized him whenever he got out early in any big match, failing to realize the pressure which he was in before facing the ball and at the same time, carrying the expectations of millions of fans on his shoulders.

At the same time somewhere else, there is a person who is not so famous as Sachin. That person just wants to earn some money, so that he can feed his family. He works in some small shop. His relatives call him worthless. They don’t know that he left his government job the first week, after being harshly treated there just because he is from backward class.

Judging and criticizing every time, without even knowing the other’s condition seems strident. But it is not always that callous if taken in a positive way.

India, recently at COP 21 in Paris, provided her framework to reduce emission intensity by 33 to 35 per cent by 2030 compared to 2005 levels and aimed for 175 GW of solar, wind energy by 2022. Developed countries called it over-ambitious goal. They didn’t realize India’s concern for energy security and environment at the same time. But even after these harsh comments, India is successfully working through “International Solar Alliance” to make its aim a reality and to establish it as a leader in clean energy.

Even if this criticizing helps or not, but from where does it come from? This is due to lack of tenderness and compassion, which as a society we tend to ignore or forget when we find ourselves or others in a condition, where we have not been or will never be. Seeing it the other way, if we already have suffered the situation through which other is going, we’ll never criticize him because we’ll know his case.

We can never live the life of others. Neither we have the right to destroy it. Appreciating someone and giving a hand without even knowing what he’s going through, is a sense of “empathy” which can only be developed. Empathy is understanding the feelings of others without going through it in real life. But as simple as “empathy” sounds, it is as hard to attain. Being constantly honest and truthful to yourself and others, and at the same time, striving for the best brings out a feeling of benevolence, which slowly but steadily leads to empathy.

I don’t know how it’s like to be a fully compassionate person. We all are struggling to be that. Empathy is hard- earned. We hurt others knowingly and unknowingly. But we should not forget that,” If we all put our imperfections, vulnerabilities and problems in a well, we’ll love to pick out our own after viewing the glitches of others.”

PS: Hey you friends! 1st time written without any help! Please be “critical” and “harsh” and show no “empathy” 😀 😀 😀 🙂